Battling Distractions

I will be the first to admit, this is a tough one for me.  I tend to be flighty unfocused easily distracted.  In the middle of working on one thing, I'll think of something else that has to be done, so I'll start it.  Then something else comes to mind - and I end up leaving for work or going to bed with a string of half-finished jobs behind me, feeling like I accomplished nothing.  Sound familiar?

So how do you keep distractions at bay?  Here are a few tips I'm trying...

1. Step away from the computer and/or the smart phone!
The internet is far and away my biggest distractor.  I could easily spend hours on Twitter, Facebook, blogs, or even Angry Birds.  (I know, it's sad, but true.)  I have found that the best way to get avoid distraction is to step away from it.  Otherwise I'll be checking every email, every tweet, and every status update as they come to my phone.

2. Set a timer.
I used to hate loading and unloading the dishwasher.  I don't know why, but I hated it, dreaded it, put it off - it was bad.  So one day I decided to time myself to see how long it actually took me to finish the dreaded task.  Do you know how long it look me?  Five minutes.  Suddenly, it didn't seem so bad anymore, and it was much easier to just get it done.  It's also easier to focus on a large job knowing that once that timer beeps, you can quit, even if it's just for a short break.

3. Focus on three to five main goals.
I love the Daily Docket printable at Simple Mom!  It's such a great way to have your entire day's plan in one place.  I tuck one into the front pocket of my day planner.  I especially love the MIT list for your three most important tasks of the day.

What are you best tips for battling distractions?  Jump over to the My Community tab to join in the discussion!

A Dream Becomes Reality

It was a day late...but today is the day I dreamed of.  I received my acceptance letter for the dental hygiene program.  I'm so excited!  This is the beginning of a new life for me and my family - a new career (once I graduate), more stability, more flexibility.  I've worked so hard for this.

Now the stress begins...along with my acceptance letter is a three page list of deposits due, supplies to purchase, dates to meet for advisement, shots to get, and more.  The supplies with the costs listed equal $1,400 - that's before books, tuition, uniforms, blood pressure cuffs, and stethoscopes.  I have to buy all of my own supplies for the program, so it's definitely going to be a financial burden for us for a while.  Not to mention balancing my almost-full-time college schedule with an almost-full-time job as a manager.  But I know it will pay off.

I'm thinking seriously about framing that acceptance letter...

Today Is The Day That Could Change Everything

Today is the day I've worked for and waited for.  It's the day I've waited over a year for as I studied and took classes.  Today is the day my letter should arrive telling me whether or not I've been accepted into dental hygiene school.  I'm excited and I'm terrified.

This is the day that could change everything.  Getting into the program, and launching a new career when I graduate in just over two years, will change our lives.  It will mean a great, stable, flexible career and a salary three times what I earn now.  It means so much to me and my family.  So I wait on pins and needles, hoping nothing gets delayed and I learn my fate today...

I'm guest posting today!

I'm so excited to be guest posting today over at Mommyhead Adventures.  Tara is a mom of two kids under the age of two, both with special needs.  She has an awesome blog.  I hope you'll check it out!

I'm sharing my own story of our experience with our youngest son.  We faced the possibility of him having Down's syndrome, and I was shocked by the opinions of some of the medical professionals we dealt with and how they treated us.  Stop by Tara's blog and check it out!

Shaping a Home - Even When You're Not Home

I recently read a post where the author described a mom's role as "shaping a home."  That is so true!  Moms are the ones who set the tone of the home, who adjust the emotional thermostat, and we're usually the ones who set the schedule as well.  For working moms, though, shaping a home can be a little harder...okay, let's face it, it's a lot harder.  It's hard a shape a home when you're away from home for hours every day.  It can be overwhelming and discouraging. 

There are a lot things you can do, though, to help keep your home and your family headed in the right direction.  Let me remind y'all: I am not a supermom.  I don't do all of these things, every day.  I'm trying to put all of them into practice on a daily basis, but it takes time, and it's hard work.  But these are all ideas that I'm working on and that are helping me shape my home and my family into what I dream of...

1. Start your days off right.  I can't say enough about how much the Hello Mornings Challenge at Inspired to Action has changed my life!  Starting every day with time alone with God and time to think through my plan for the day makes things run smoother, even when I have a crazy busy day ahead of me.
2. Know your mission.  While you're visiting Inspired to Action, download Kat's ebook on family mission statements.  I had never really thought about family mission statements, until I started reading her blog.  That's when I realized - if you don't know what your goals are, how are you going to plan to reach them?
3. Have daily family mealtimes.  I realize that this may not be possible every day, but family mealtimes are so important, especially when you're a working mom.  Plan to sit down to dinner together as a family at least three nights a week - more often if possible.  Plan some special nights, too - my boys love Italian nights - when we eat spaghetti at a "fancy" table (set by them, including hand-written menus) and listen to The Godfather soundtrack on our iPod.  It doesn't have to be complicated to be special.
4. Get into a routine.  This one is really tricky for me, because my schedule often changes from week to week.  I'm trying a new approach starting this week, though - I have four things that are on my daily must-do list.  Things that need to be done weekly will be divided up according to this week's schedule.  I have it all written out on two index cards - nothing complicated.  I'm hoping it will help keep us all more organized and make sure the house isn't a disaster zone routine jobs are getting done.
5. Spend daily quiet time with your kids.  Take a few minutes out each day to read the Bible and pray with your kids.  For us, it's at bedtime.  My boys look forward to reading and cuddling before bed, and I look forward to hearing their prayer requests and having a few minutes of one-on-one time with them.  If you're looking for a good place to start, Keys for Kids devotionals are great.

What do you do to help shape your home?  I would love to hear your ideas, resources you love, and things that have worked for you!  Please leave a comment, tweet me @amandablogs, or email me at amandablogs79(at)yahoo(dot)com.

Simple Joys - 3/25

Little things I've loved this week...

• My weekly lunch out with my three favorite guys
• Zumba classes at work - tons of fun
• Mornings with coffee, my Bible and my prayer journal
• My friends
• A little extra time to work on my blog - I still have so many ideas I want to work on, though!

Journal of a Newbie Working Mom

When I wrote this journal entry, I had been working for four months after years as a stay at home mom...

Sunday, March 9, 2008

I’ve got to learn to relax. Life marches on at the same hectic pace, and lately I seem to be under a state of constant stress.


Days before I was supposed to start my new assistant manager’s job, plans changed – I was promoted to co-manager of [a location closer to my home]. I love working closer to home, and it’s still part-time, but I now have to attend twice-a-month leadership meetings, and since the club has really gone downhill the past few months, there is enormous added pressure to turn the club around. It has a lot of perks – bonuses, another raise coming up soon – but wow, how the stress levels rose!

I found awesome new curriculum from GPH for Kids BLAST. Things still need lots of work and tweaking, but its going better. It’s still a major source of stress, especially with the Easter egg hunt coming up in less than two weeks, plus I help Robby type all three of his weekly messages. I really feel like I work two jobs, because when I’m not at Curves, I’m at the church.

Bobby is nearly done with his schoolwork for the year. We’ll probably finish in late April/early May. I’m so excited about taking the summer off! We’re going to do fun stuff this summer and not start school until September.

I’m trying to streamline my schedule as much as possible, but I’m still not taking time for myself like I should. I just feel so much pressure to be perfect! I thought that ended in college…but I was wrong. I feel like Robby gets the worst end of the deal. I try so hard to be a great mom, teacher, manager, kids ministry director – and at the end of the day, I’m exhausted. I think I do good as a mom, but lousy as a wife and homemaker. I just really want to figure out how to juggle it all and still keep my sanity. I “change hats” so to speak so many times in a day it makes my head spin. How on earth do other women do it all? I do good to get in my quiet time, I rarely have time to exercise (what an example!), and time for scrapbooking is non-existent. I’ve got to figure out how to do this better! I don’t want Robby, Bobby, and Spencer to look back and remember me as a stressed out, uptight bundle of nerves.

Family Funnies

How do you deal with objections to your ideas? (whether work or parenting related)

Make us laugh- one of your funniest memories to date.

Okay, I can't resist sharing a really funny story about my family...there are a lot of funny stories about my family, because they're all insane, but this is one of my favorites.

The first time my family came to visit after we moved to coastal Texas, we decided to show off the area.  We planned a trip to the beach and a fabulous seafood restaurant.  So we packed up and took a day trip to Galveston.  It was great, even though it was January.  The weather was perfect.  The day was beautiful.  We saw dolphins swimming on the ferry ride over.  We had a great time shopping along The Strand.  Then we got to Willie G's...that's when things got ugly.

The eight of us (my hubby, kiddos and me, my parents, and my dad's parents) were seated at table overlooking the water as the sun set.  The lights were low, the atmosphere was perfect...then our waiter brough the wine list.  My family doesn't drink.  Did my grandma just order a Sprite?  Of course not.  She started loudly explaining to the waiter that we don't drink, none of drink, we've never been drinkers, we don't need the wine list at all.  Sigh.

She complains about the price of the food the whole time they're looking at the menu, even though we'd told them months in advance that we would all go Dutch at the restaurant, and she and my grandpa split a plate.  At this point, I wanted to crawl under the table...I mean, that fish was in the ocean this morning and on her plate that night - how much better can it get?

Then came the kicker - as she looked around at the dim lighting, she loudly complained, "As much as we're paying for food here, can't they afford to turn some lights on?"  I had to step out.  My mom and I went to the ladies room and laughed until we were hurting.  What else could you do?

Let's just say that on all visits afterward, seafood has not been on the menu...fine dining and my grandparents do not make a good combination.

My Joy and My Challenge

They are my greatest joys and my greatest challenges.  They changed my life forever when they entered it.

My youngest, who gave us a major health scare three months in our pregnancy, and another at birth.  My always smiling, always happy, always making people laugh, cuddle-loving son.  Active, athletic, outgoing, laid-back and optimistic, he is his daddy all over again.

My oldest, who is approaching his teen years much too quickly.  My sometimes easy-going son who can become the poster child for strong willed children everywhere in seconds.  My son who picks flowers and makes cards to make his momma smile.  Artistic, emotional, creative, compassionate, perfectionist - undeniably just like me.

I never knew until I had my sons that you really can love so much it hurts.  And I never knew how helpless I would sometimes feel as a mom.  Sometimes, I have no idea what to do with these precious gifts or how to parent them - they're polar opposities, and what works with one fails with the other.  I'm at a total loss.  Some days, all I can do is pray and beg for wisdom and guidance and grace.  That's why I'm taking the 21 Days of Prayer for our Sons challenge, beginning April 1.  Will you join me?  Buy the ebook Warrior Prayers - it will change your prayer life forever - and join the challenge to do something that can change our sons' lives forever.

Perfectly Imperfect: Letting Go Of Expectations

There are a lot of expectations placed on us as moms.  Some of them we put on ourselves, others are piled on by others.  Our families expect us to be the homemaker (even if we work outside the home), chef, chauffer, coach, cheerleader, tutor, teacher and the list goes on.  Our churches expect us to be Sunday school teachers, nursery volunteers, Bible study teachers, choir members, worship leaders, and more.  Our bosses expect us to be 100% at work while we try not to focus on the dozens of other responsibilites running through our minds while we're there.  It can get very overwhelming very fast.

One of the hardest lessons a Christian working mom has to learn is to let go of expectations.  I've had to learn, very slowly, that I can't do it all.  I can't bring homemade goodies to every women's ministries meeting - I can't even attend every meeting.  I won't have time for all the reading I'd like to do, and I won't have homemade dinners every night for my family.  Some nights, we're going to eat hot dogs or fish sticks or drive-thru meals.  I won't get as much sleep or rest as I'd really to.  But I have to go of some of those expectations if I'm ever going to manage to do all that I do.

Part of learning to be satisfied with our role as a working mom is letting go.  We have to let go of the life we thought we would have and grieve what can't be before we can embrace what God has for us here and now.  I spent years wishing I could just go back to being a stay at home mom.  It was only when I accepted the fact that I will always be a working mom and that this is just where God wants me right now, that I started to truly find joy and purpose in what I do. 

Our family's life doesn't look like everyone else's...and that's okay.  Sure, I get frustrated sometimes.  There are still days that I have a hard time leaving the house and days I wish I could go to homeschool co-op or summer reading club with my kids.  But God has called us to something different.  It's overwhelming sometimes, and at times I feel like a total failure, but to Him, we're all perfectly imperfect.  We might not live up to other people's expectations, but we're doing our best to live up to His - and that's all that really matters.

I hope you're enjoying my new blog feature, Working With Delight.  There are so few resources available to Christian working moms, so I decided to start putting together my own.  I would love to hear your ideas, struggles, victories, resources and more!  You can connect with me through comments, email me at amandablogs79(at)yahoo(dot)com, or follow me on Twitter @amandablogs.